I'm finished with my Master's!
Contrary to my initial suspicions, my thesis did not actually kill me. I gave my thesis defense in early May and it was received really well by my committee members. Hearing, "Congratulations! Your thesis has been approved," was amazing. I dropped my thesis at the publisher earlier this week, so I'm officially done. SCHOOL'S OUT FOREVER!
To celebrate my 2 years of hard work, I'm taking a celebracation. My next adventure--6 weeks of backpacking across Europe with my traveling buddie Kim starts Monday, June 30. I'm so excited to write, change up my head space, experience beautiful places, art, food, and just RELAX! I'll post updates periodically along the way. We'll be visiting London, Amsterdam, Paris, Barcelona, San Sebastian, French Riviera: Marseilles, Nice, & St Tropez, Monaco, the 5 villages of the Cinque Terre on the Italian Riviera, Venice, Florence, Tuscan Countryside, Rome, Pompeii, Athens, and some Greek islands...and a few other friends will be making guest appearances in some locations.
It has been awhile since travel has been a consistent part of my life and it has been greatly missed. Gone are the hitchhiking, fly by the seat of my pants Janel adventures that used to lead me to the strangest places with the strangest people. I also haven't pulled my famous throw-a-dart-at-a-map-and-drive-there-on-a-whim maneuver in years either. Styles may change, but my initial urge to explore and experience different walks of life on my own terms remains strong. Too strong to ignore. The clarity that wandering has always granted leads me to appreciate what I have at home and approach my life with revitalized energy. Over the last 2 years I let many aspects of my life slide as I worked toward my graduate degree, so I'm looking forward to getting back in touch with myself and getting my head straight as I begin the next phase of my life.
Gardens of the mind must be weeded or they cannot flourish.
Some pre-trip fluffing......
San Sebastian, Spain
Vernazza, Itally (one of the villages we'll be visiting in Cinque Terre)
Tuscan Countryside
Even after listening to my mother’s concerned bantering regarding the dangers of international travel, I am ready to set sail on my European adventure. Maybe my readiness is premature, considering that I may not make it out alive. According to my mom (and most assuredly suggested by the ladies of The View…and/or “The Oprah”) a staggering percentage of young women who travel abroad end up rotting in foreign jail cells after being falsely accused of murder. Shocking, I know. Apparently this happens FREQUENTLY. According to my mom (and I’m sure validated by millions of documented cases) this typically happens when a poor wide-eyed college girl is in the wrong place at the wrong time (i.e., in a dark alley just after a murder has taken place). In this tragic example, the girl stoops over a fallen body to check for a pulse, leaving her fingerprints all over the victim. Just as she realizes the unfortunate Joe is dead, the fuzz shows up. Henceforth, girlfriend is booked and thrown in jail. As an American in a foreign country she has no rights, so she’s forced to live out the remainder of her miserable days in a 4x4 jail cell in Tuscany, knowing that she’ll never again enjoy a glass of wine. Never. And the only cheese she’ll have the opportunity to experience is PRISON Vel-fuckin-veta.
The small percentage of women who narrowly escape the pulls of European jails face other significant challenges. According to my mom--and again the seed was probably planted by Barbara Walters or whoever hosts 20/20 nowadays--another alarming percentage of unsuspecting American women are lured back to the lairs of mysterious European men. Evidently Italian men have a reputation for being “sexy” & “suave” and they try to work that angle to American tourists. Rumor has it that American tourists find an Italian accent so irresistible that whenever an Italian man looks an American woman directly in the eyes and utters the word “Bella,” she immediately drops trow and will willingly go off with him wherever he beckons. Of course when their destination is reached, the Italian stallion will most assuredly slip the naïve girl a mickey and have his way with her. She’ll wake up the next morning lying naked between the grapevines of a 200-year-old vineyard with a splitting headache and no recollection of what happened the night before with Alfonso-what’s-his-face.
If neither of the two aforementioned doomsday scenarios befall an American girl abroad, then according to my traveling companion’s mother, she’s most likely going to return to the States with AIDS. Yes, AIDS. (From all of the illicit anonymous sex she had abroad) For this reason she should bring condoms. Not just one or two. Oh no, she should go to Costco and load up on Trojans like that pony is goin outta style.
Who would’ve guessed that two ladies traveling abroad to celebrate their recent graduate degrees could face so many dangers? I thought we were just independent women in pursuit of fun. Apparently we are so much more than that. We’re two naïve hookers who are about to embark on a murderous rampage across Western Europe.
Stay chuned for all of the gory details on how we subvert the law, nibble on cheese, and guzzle wine, as we gear up to get titty on the French Rivvie and beyond.
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